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diwali sadness:)

I've this feeling of missing and sadness on my new year eves, diwalis and all these auspicious times when people around the world are having fun, laughing, eating special food, and partying, especially on new years they are having the best life out there..  with friends and family while lonely me here spend the night on bed and depressed about how I'm missing about everything, not even having a special friend or person to text me and ask how I'm feeling. It just sucks to be lonely...
Hearing fireworks sound makes me sad, it trigger my tears, but.. I think I should console myself. That isn't everything, every year isn't gonna be like this, maybe 5 years from now I will 25 I will have the best life, finally I'm a doctor, I earn good, I might or might find a significant other but I hope I find a worthy one.. and some genuine new friends:) 
But yea reading out there on reddit made me feel better, it makes me feel good that there are more people out there who is going through same situation, I'm not alone. Maybe if we meet, they might like to talk to me.. I don't know who these people are but some kind of soul connection, meeting the new people and talking to them about random things, about life, their childhood, how they grew up, analyzing their personality and habit, their views, they gotta sing, they let me tell my dreams, my ideas, things I used to believe as a kid, and everything I wanted to say... 
I think that's how how the auspicious night should be spend.. to spend the special night with special people. Family is special but mine is very weird kind of family, although there's heart connection and love for one another but it's all silence here, they are not friendly or do not talk much, its just normal day here, I just stay inside my bed, to stop myself from overthinking now I'm was reading on reddit, about other peoples lonely experiences.

I hope someday my dreams will come true, someday I can attent a grant new year party, have fun with my special people and finally one day will have a good time with with significant other:) I hope god will find a way to make my dreams come true. So if I want the life I'm dreaming for myself now I should work hard, so one day i can afford everything. 

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