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Who are you even?

You were born, you were assigned a name, you started to walk, you made little steps, you tried to imitate your parents and imbibed many of their qualities, as a kid you were unaware of the worldly matters, you were a little kid who found happiness in little things, you didn't even cared about what other will think of you, you just laughed out loud when you felt like, being fake was just a unfamiliar thing, you didn't knew how to deceive for real.
Everyday was interesting, It was about discovering new things, getting excited about the little things, that enthusiasm to play with your cousins.
As years pass by, you started to go to school, there you learned, made friends, you started to believe in something,
And you realised you're even a person. You have emotions, you started to know what is it like to feel ashamed and pity. You Started to go in search things which is found acceptable in this social construct to fit it, you started to seek validations, you started to dress and behaved accordingly to be seen as likeable, do you all even realise? We are just doing many of things to be seen as likable and fit it?
Would I be even take this career if it wasn't about prestige, money, and to be seen as a successful individual.

Well I don't even own this name, I had met a girl who have exact name of mine, so this is so not unique though,
When my loved ones, when my mom hears my name I'm pretty sure, what she is recalls is how I made my baby step, trying to retrace the day when i started to call her 'Amma' for the first time, the days when there was no distance between us,
When my dad hears my name, what he recalls is the days when he was free to hold my hands, the nights when I was so little and I fell asleep on his chest, the days when i used to listen to his sleep time stories.
When my brother hears my name, what he recalls is the moments we cherished together, the fights, the sharing, the Jokes we shared.
The person. What person I'm is a confusing question to me?
What am I even?
How do I define myself ?
Is it my career qualifications? Is it my marks? Is my past mistakes? Is it how I look like which is extremely unreliable.
To define and connect what I'm, I can't explain. But I think my Deeds, My thoughts, what I feel about a particular thing, what music I like to listen to, how I feel after someone has disrespected me, what movies I like to watch, what books I like to read about, what symbolism I try to absorb from a book, what things I like to do in my free time, what will I do when I'm left alone, my writings, how I treat someone even though they were so mean towards me, how i treat the unkind and those in suffering, what food I like to eat, what interpretation I make out of a incident..
All those will explain a lot, what person I'm.
©anagha_writes


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